It can be a lonely life being a fish. Your career options are

limited, auch für die Terraristik the opportunities for travel slim and the only lasting

relationships you can hope for are distinctly arranged.

On the other

hand, you have a lovely tank, food delivered daily and a nice view.

Alright, so the exact dimensions of your tank may vary according to

budget, but we’d all have a bigger flat if we could afford it. And how

much space do you really need? Once you’ve found somewhere to put the

castle and the gravel, you only need some communal living space to swim

around in. What’s really important is what you do with the space you

have. The usual Vettriano prints are ill suited to an aquatic

environment and water features are largely redundant. You could try a

lava lamp, but I wouldn’t advise it if you want to keep your gills

intact. No, what you really need is a 3D aquarium background.

We’re

all leading busy cosmopolitan lives, but it’s still good to have a

little reminder of the old country on your wall. A little bit of the ol’

big blue that ma and pa used to talk about. 3D aquarium backgrounds are

available which mimic the coral reefs of the Galapagos Islands. So what

if you’re a goldfish with no heritage more dignified than the display

tanks of Westfield? There’re any number of New Yorkers who claim

Scottish blood on far more tenuous grounds. Even if some snooty

swordtails should question the efficacy of such a display, you can

simply point out the additional benefits beyond the simply baronial. For

a start, they’re incredibly attractive things. The urban minimalism of

your flatmate’s bedsit might not speak of your own aquatic roots, but a

finely sculpted, fully three-dimensional backdrop can lend your little

corner of it a certain underwater charm. And it’ll probably create a

soothing atmosphere for him, as well. That’s why he has you after all; a

calming fin at the end of a wearying day. It’s just the way you swim,

you laidback beast you.

There are also the remarkable health

benefits. We’re always being told that we need to keep our scales clean,

but how many of us have the time? It’s a sedentary life in a tank and

there just aren’t the rocks you need to exfoliate. The protruding

surfaces offer just the sort of abrasive surface to rub against; shed

those scales and keep that streamline form. The textured backdrop is

also a great environment for fostering friendly bacteria. Beats tipping a

tub of Yakult into your tank every day.

There really is no better

way to stay stylish, happy and healthy in your little fishy world than

to invest in a 3D background for your aquarium. You’ll love it, your

tankmates will love it and your owner will love it, too. Which is just

as well – they’re paying after all.